Life can feel like a balancing act sometimes. My 2023 New Years Resolution was to journal daily – I felt that by collecting my thoughts and planning each day, I would somehow become the incredibly organized and motivated person I knew I could be. My last journal entry of the year ended with “spend 5 min planning. No matter what”. That was on January 10th. Welp. Better luck next year right?
Incredibly, my luck did change. Or rather yet, my outlook and intention did. Looking back, I saw journaling as a rigid task that had to be done in a particular way with flowy prose addressing some deep philosophical question . Now, I am more fluid in my interpretation because that is what works for me. Some days I write, some days I plan. Some days I don’t do anything at all and that’s ok. I’m doing this for me and no one else.
This isn’t a post about journaling though, although it can be. Instead, this is a post about intention. About looking back to where you were and looking forward to where you want to be.
What are you doing now that is no longer serving you?
What about that thing makes it hard to let go?
What small but consistent changes can you make to get to your future self?
Setting intention
But wait – aren’t intentions and resolutions the same thing? I don’t think so. When you resolve to do something, you are by definition resolute – determined and unwavering. This sounds great on paper, but it’s the rigidity that leads so many resolutions to fall by the wayside. In fact, Quitter’s Day is celebrated the 2nd Friday of Jan (coincidentally the 10th this year) to honor the 80% who set resolutions only to quickly set them aside.
The act of setting an intention is often broader and less defined than a goal. Intentions are a way to identify what is important to you and establish practices of daily action that align with where you want to be. A north star as it were. The difference can seem subtle at times, but intentions are forgiving. It’s all about asking yourself what you want and then using conscious awareness to point yourself in that direction.
Resolution vs Intention
An intention isn’t set it and forget it though, no more than a resolution or a goal is. The intention behind an intention (pun intended) is to put foremost the “why” behind the action. You may want to lose 10 lbs, save more money or travel more, but without being clear to yourself the reason, it makes the behavior change more difficult.
- Are you wanting to become healthier in order to wean off medications for heart disease or diabetes? Did you used to enjoy hiking but now the pain in your knees makes it difficult?
- Do you want financial freedom so that you can go part time or quit that second job? Do you have children and want to gift them a college fund? Do you want to use your savings for a new car that is more reliable?
- Will you be traveling to visit old friends who now live in far places? Do you have a dream of creating a travel blog? Or has deep sea diving been a lifelong goal?
Once you are clear with the reason you want to make a change, then you can begin to identify behaviors to support these changes. It often helps to take a few minutes each morning and remind yourself of your intention. Refer back to them throughout the day, start small and give yourself grace. Always give yourself grace to start again and make an aligned choice the next time.
Mindful intention examples
Related goal examples
– I will find joy in the movement and abilities of my body
-I will try one new type of exercise class each month
– I will invite a friend to do an activity with (hiking, skating, walking, grocery shopping)
– I will put on music when I am cleaning the house/cooking dinner/bathing the kids
– I will build a healthier relationship with money
– I will watch YouTube videos on financial freedom
– I will signup for an online budget tracker or create a spreadsheet to have a clear picture of my finances
– I will put all my “wants” in a virtual shopping cart and only buy once a week/month etc
– I will create healthier technology boundaries
– Dinner will be screen free
– I will enable a timer on social media apps to alert me after a specific amount of time
– I will avoid screens for at least an hour before bed
Creating habits
The act of creating a new habit feels extremely daunting. But in reality nearly every. single. thing. we do is habit. Some just happen to work FOR you while others are against your new intentions. The key then is to take a long hard look at what isn’t working for you, again evaluating the “why”, and brainstorm ways you can make the movements you are already taking work in your favor.
New actions, over time, do become easier. Our brains have the amazing capacity to adjust, change form and create new pathways. That doesn’t mean they happen over night. Starting small is often the key to making a new habit stick. Others find that rewarding themselves when they stick with something, or using a tracking tool as motivation is helpful. Finding what works for YOU is the answer, and that answer is different for everyone.
I first learned about habit stacking in James Clear’s New York Times best selling book, Atomic Habits. This is the idea that you add a new habit to an already existing habit, thus getting more bang for your buck. Because I am very type A and have spent my adult life as a nurse and a pharmacist, multi-tasking is in my blood. Habit stacking was speaking my love language. It almost became a game – let’s be honest – I made it a game to see how many different things I could add to things I was already doing.
I tried many (not all stuck) but my favorite successful habit stack derived from my desire to improve my balance. Years before I had stayed at an AirBNB that for some ungodly reason came with a balance board. I nearly fell on my face many times that weekend, but this seemed the perfect way to improve my balance now. So I dropped the $15 bucks and for almost two years, twice a day for approximately 2 minutes while I brush my teeth, I am proudly doing so upon my balance board.
Function Medicine and Intentions
Because I am a functional medicine provider, and health care goal are often top of mind at the start of a New Year, I would like to offer some thoughts from an unconventional perspective.
- Just as plants require healthy soil, fresh water and sunshine to thrive, so do we. (sub whole foods for the soil)
- Sleep is the time for your body to process all it had to deal with during the day. If you can squeeze in a bit more shut eye (ideally 7-9 hours a night), I guarantee that you will think clearer, focus better and have a little more tolerance for the silly things that creep up
- Your gut is life. 70% of our immune system and 90% of your serotonin (the “happy hormone”) originate in your gut. Not to mention all the vitamins that are produced, and nutrients that are absorbed here. Nearly everyone can benefit from a quality probiotic.
- Think back to your childhood. Maybe you were like me and somersaulted down the hall or watched TV in a headstand? Maybe you loved to climb trees. Was biking your thing? Chances are there was a highly active something that you loved and it may feel like a lifetime ago that you experienced that kind of exhilaration with an activity. You may not be able to do the same thing or to the same degree, but movement and “exercise” doesn’t have to be just another task you check off because you have to. Make it fun. Find something that excites you, even just a little bit.
- Finally, everything is better with a friend. Even commiserating over how hard these dang New Year’s resolutions are. Even if it’s just someone you’ve only met. Social interactions are as beneficial to our health as eating our veggies or going to the gym. And they give you a lot more to look forward to than your broccoli casserole.
Happy New Year
As you ring in 2025 and all the years to come, remember: the things that we do doing the course of the day are not inherently good or bad. Sometimes they just are and their usefulness changes as we change. I’m 46 now and can no longer run, party or eat hostess cupcakes like I used to. I’m ok with all these things. My mind, body and mindset are in a different place, and so are my new habits. Everything we do is habit – may you make this year the year to go where you want to go and be who you want to be. Intentionally.